“You are altogether beautiful my darling, and there is no blemish in you.”                

Song of Solomon 4:7


In American culture, image is everything - especially when it comes to physical beauty. Rarely will you see a magazine cover photo of someone that has not been touched up or airbrushed for perfection. As a result, men and women alike end up comparing themselves, especially physically, to the airbrushed photos of the latest magazine. And, there is no way to compare. The images on the magazine cover often stand (unrealistically I might add) in stark contrast to the images revealed by the individual’s mirror.


The same is true with social media.  Be it Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, or whatever platform of preference you use, the images you see there are rarely what you see when you look at yourself in the mirror.


What do you see when you look in the mirror?  What do the images in your mind tell you to think about yourself as you look in the mirror? Do those images tell you you are beautiful? Do those images tell you you are handsome? Or, do those images in your mind tell the mirror you’re “less than”, unattractive, unwanted, fat, or ugly or something worse? Understand this…


A mirror will only ever show you the images already in your mind.


Periodically in my office, I’ll ask a woman if she believes she is beautiful. 9 times out of 10, the woman, regardless of the beauty of her outward appearance, will pause and then shamefully respond that she doesn’t think she’s beautiful.


Sadly, it never ceases to amaze me at the responses. I’ve had drop-dead gorgeous women begin to cry upon hearing that question.  Their tears tell me everything I need to know.  Those tears are an outward reflection of a perceived inward reality.  I say perceived reality for a reason.  For this woman, her perception of herself has become her reality.  Her tears are a revelation of the images stored in her mind.  And unfortunately, those images tell her what to think when she sees herself - that she’s not beautiful. 


At the same time, I’ve had women, who by our worldly standards would not be considered physically beautiful, consider themselves beautiful. As the saying goes, “Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder.” And it proves once again that…


A mirror will only ever show you the images already in your mind.


Let me ask you, “Are you beautiful?”  


Before you answer out loud, think about your answer.  


How did you come to your answer?  What is the basis of your determination as to whether or not you’re beautiful?  Is it based on what others through the years have said about you?  Is it based on what God says about you?  What is the basis of your perception and determination of whether or not you’re beautiful?


Solomon said to his Shulamite love, “You are altogether beautiful my darling, and there is no blemish in you (Song of Solomon 4:7).”  


Let me ask you ladies, if you’re married and your husband tells you you’re beautiful, do you believe him?  I’ve found it’s rather common for wives to struggle to believe their husband’s statement.  They’ll say to me, “He’s supposed to say that, afterall, he’s my husband.”  Or, they’ll say, “I know he says that I’m beautiful, but I just can’t believe he actually thinks it.”


If you’re a married woman, I may not know your husband, but if he’s like most husbands I know, he actually does believe that you’re beautiful.  Let me challenge you to receive his words as the truth.  Just because you may struggle to believe it about yourself doesn’t mean that he struggles to believe it.  Maybe God wants to use his words of affirmation as a means of transforming years of “stinkin’ thinkin’” about yourself.


At the end of it all, the most important thing in this life is not what others say about you, what you say about yourself, but what God, Himself, says about you.  Take a few moments to meditate on these biblical passages of what God says about you: Psalm 28:7, Psalm 46:5, Psalm 139:13-16, Psalm 143:8, Isaiah 64:8, Zephaniah 3:17, 2 Corinthians 12:9, Ephesians 2:10, Colossians 2:10, and 1 Peter 3:3-4


  • When you look in the mirror, what do you see?
  • How is your mirror reflecting the images already in your mind?
  • Have the images of American culture influenced how you see yourself? If so, how?
  • What does God say about you?  How should that inform what you see when you look in the mirror?